~Bertha Belch, a missionary from Africa, will be speaking tonight at Calvary Methodist. Come hear Bertha Belch all the way from Africa.
~PRAYER & FASTING Conference: "The cost for attending the Fasting and Prayer Conference includes meals."
~The sermon this morning: "Jesus Walks on the Water." The sermon tonight: Searching for Jesus."
~Our youth basketball team is back in action Wednesday at 8 PM in the recreation hall. Come out and watch us kill Christ the King.
~Ladies, don’t forget the rummage sale. It’s a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Don’t forget your husbands.
~The peacemaking meeting scheduled for today has been canceled due to a conflict.
~Smile at someone who is hard to love. Say "Hell" to someone who doesn’t care much about you.
~Don’t let worry kill you off -- let the Church help.
~Miss Charlene Mason sang "I will not pass this way again," giving obvious pleasure to the congregation.
~For those of you who have children and don’t know it, we have a nursery downstairs.
~Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all the help they can get.
~Barbara remains in the hospital and needs blood donors for more transfusions. She is also having trouble sleeping and requests tapes of Pastor Jack’s sermons.
~The Rector will preach his farewell message after which the choir will sing: "Break Forth Into Joy."
~Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days.
~A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music will follow.
~At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be "What Is Hell?" Come early and listen to our choir practice.
~Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.
~Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.
~Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you want remembered.
~Attend and you will hear an excellent speaker and heave a healthy lunch.
~The church will host an evening of fine dining, super entertainment and gracious hostility.
~Potluck supper Sunday at 5:00 PM - prayer and medication to follow.
~The ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind. They maybe seen in the basement on Friday afternoon.
~This evening at 7 PM there will be a hymn sing in the park across from the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.
~Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10 AM. All ladies are invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the BS is done.
~The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the congregation would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday.
~Low Self-esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 PM. Please use the back door.
~The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare’s Hamlet in the Church basement Friday at 7 PM. The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.
~Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use large double door at the side entrance.
~The Associate Minister unveiled the church’s new tithing campaign slogan last Sunday: "I Upped My Pledge - Up Yours."
You know you’re living in 2005 when...
1. You accidentally enter your password on the microwave.
2. You haven’t played solitaire with real cards in years.
3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 3.
4. You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you.
5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that they don’t have e-mail addresses.
6. You go home after a long day at work you still answer the phone in a business manner.
7. You make phone calls from home, you accidentally dial "9" to get an outside line.
8. You’ve sat at the same desk for four years and worked for three different companies.
10. You learn about your redundancy on the 11 o’clock news.
11. Your boss doesn’t have the ability to do your job.
12. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if anyone is home.
13. Every commercial on television has a web site at the bottom of the screen.
14. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn’t have the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you turn around to go to get it.
15. You get up in the morning and go on-line before getting your coffee.
16. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. :) :)
17. You’re reading this and nodding and laughing.
18. Even worse, you know exactly to whom you are going to forward this message.
19. You are too busy to notice there wasn’t a #9 on this list.
20. You actually scrolled back up to check that there wasn’t a #9 on this list.
INTERESTING FACTS
A zebra is white with black stripes.
All the planets in our solar system rotate anticlockwise, except Venus. It is the only planet that rotates clockwise.
Hummingbirds are the only animal that can also fly backwards.
Insects do not make noises with their voices. The noise of bees, mosquitoes and other buzzing insects is caused by rapidly moving their wings.
The cockroach is the fastest animal on 6 legs covering a meter a second.
The word "listen" contains the same letters as the word "silent".
The only 2 animals that can see behind itself without turning it’s head are the rabbit and the parrot.
A ’jiffy’ is an actual unit of time for 1/100th of a second.
The whip makes a cracking sound because its tip moves faster than the speed of sound.
A hippopotamus can run faster than a man.
’Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia’ is the fear of long words.
Didaskaleinophobia is the fear of going to school.
Phobatrivaphobia is a fear of trivia about phobias !!
It is impossible to lick your elbow. ( We know you gonna try this !!! )
A snail can sleep for 3 years. ( wow, lucky chap eh ? )
The names of the continents all end with the same letter with which they start
"Almost" is the longest word in the English language with all the letters in alphabetical order.
Twenty-Four-Karat Gold is not pure gold since there is a small amount of copper in it. Absolutely pure gold is so soft that it can be molded with the hands.
Electricity doesn’t move through a wire but through a field around the wire.
Do you know the names of the three wise monkeys? They are: Mizaru (See no evil), Mikazaru (Hear no evil), and Mazaru (Say no evil ).
55 per cent of people yawn within 5 minutes of seeing someone else yawn. Reading about yawning makes most people yawn. hello, zzzzz zzzz ?
